Days 11 and 12

Nothing of note happened on Day 11, other than I took commenters' excellent advice and arranged to meet B. at a coffee shop near the concert venue instead of giving him my home address out of convenience's sake.

So here I am, on D(ate)-Day. All of Dori's pre-date anxieties hold true for me, except the ironing. No ironing here! That's one less anxiety for me.

I had terrible nightmares last night. One of which was that I arranged to meet B. at a specific time and place, but I was 40 minutes late, and I called him to apologize and see where he was, and he was justifiably peeved and had left, and I begged and pleaded and cried for another chance, but he said no.

Will I recognize him? Does he look like his picture? Will he do the drive-around-the-block-to-get-a-look-at-me-and-then-stand-me-up? Is this all an elaborate trick to humiliate me? Am I being Punk'd (or perhaps, Jew'd?)? Will I be able to understand his accent? What if he engages in totally inappropriate first-date behavior ( e.g., insults me, touches me, refers to certain body parts, touches certain body parts?) What if we hate each other on sight but are forced to spend several hours together at this concert? What if we like each other? What about the age difference? He's 4 years younger than I, which is a bigger age gap than any other previous dating experience of mine. His age-range criteria fell two years short of my age. Reading over his profile again, I see that it tells very little about him, which makes me wonder, how carefully did I evaluate him before basing my opinion on his picture? Do we have the same expectations for the evening, and for dating in general? Speaking of which, what are my expectations? I hope we both like each other equally, and have a good time, and plan to meet again.

Things that can go wrong: The weather--cooler than expected, which affects my wardrobe decision. My hair--any humidity and poof! Instant 'fro. My shoes--spectacular peep-toed pumps which look great with my outfit but are impractical for traipsing all over my town and staying upright at a standing-room-only concert. Also, the right one is in need of restitching in a key location, so if the last few stitches give tonight, I may need a piggy-back ride home. My stomach--nervous, which means I didn't eat much today which means drinking more than one alcoholic beverage is a bad idea.

What an odd way to meet people, this online dating thing. Complete strangers who know very little about each other agree to meet in person to see if they like each other enough to meet again. What are the odds that this other person is my version of normal? This experience is testing the boundaries of my comfort zone. I am comfortable with the way I have constructed my life: I know how to be single, I know how to be alone, I know that being alone is important to me. Meeting new people is hard for me for a few reasons: 1) I'm shy, and 2) I don't have a huge network of friends and contacts, so I rarely encounter new people.

Charming but single (a new blog find) put it so precisely: "Yes, I do want to date. But I also don't want to go on bad dates and lower my standards." Therefore, it's a lot easier to stay at home, in the comfort zone, rather than risk.

At any rate, I have just enough time for a nap before commencing date preparations.