Days 19 and 20
Things are a little slow around here, which I'm attributing to the holiday weekend and to the fact that my interest is starting to fade 3 weeks into this 4-week experience.
I received a very sweet "I like you, do you like me back?" type of email from B. I replied that I didn't feel a romantic connection, but I liked him very much, thought he was sweet/cute/smart. He responded that he appreciated my honesty. I'm glad our exchange was civil. I do wish I could figure out what that little magic element is, and how it boils down into someone's profile, so that I (and I would share this information with the world!) could better predict whether I will like someone in that special way, even if they meet all the other cute/smart type criteria.
Funny Guy asked to meet after our respective schedules calm down next week, so I suggested lunch, as we work relatively near each other.
Bike Guy and I are exchanging daily emails.
I received an email the other day from someone new -- PhD Guy. The email was writtern pretty well, as was the profile. He (obvs) has an advanced degree, which is great, 'cause I like smarts, and he has lived in a few places that I have lived, but I just don't feel like replying to his message. His pictures are just okay. I wonder if this is the same process that the-people-I-wrote-to-who-didn't-respond go through? I don't want to reject him outright, because I'm still thinking about replying, even if it has been a few days, but I haven't been able to bring myself to start up a conversation, and I don't know why. Am I just tired? Or do I have a good gut reaction to the profile (thanks, but no thanks?)? Or am I ruling him out based on his photos? I'm sort of stalling for time.
I do check JDate daily, just to keep myself active so that my profile will appear towards the top of the list. I've been noticing profiles that come up in my searches with names like "not looking" and "this is a waste of 35 bucks." So, if you're "not looking" and already have a bad attitude, why bother? I wonder if profiles like these get any responses. Also the ones with fake pictures--you know the ones I mean? Pictures that are clearly don't represent the person?
I spend a lot of time reading blogs, and in an unscientific study, I've come across several where people have read each others' posts, started a conversation via commenting, fell in love, met in person, and are blogging happily ever after. Is this online dating 2.0? Is blogging the new JDating?
posted by Amy at 8:25 AM
4 Comments:
You are posing many good questions. My take: JDate is not a science. You can analyze N and all the other stats (which is cool and hilarious), and you can mull over why you don't reply to someone (or why he doesn't respond to you), but in my experience, succeeding in the JDate world is just about tenacity. Go out with a ton of people (not indiscriminately--just over the course of months), and eventually you will meet someone great. It really works, as tons of my married friends can attest (and I can, to a certain extent, since I've fallen in love with 2 JDate guys, both of whom I was excited about meeting and instantly liked--there was no ambiguity). I share your frustration about the Bitter JDaters and the ones who have girlfriends but check in obsessively. And: do you know of any MALE online dating people who are blogging? It seems like all of the dating-relating blogs (us, Superjux, etc.) are WOMEN. Who are the guys falling in 2.0 blog-love? Send me the links! And keep going. One more week. Get your money's worth. And keep us posted!
5:04 AM
I think it's interesting that you are looking at Jdate as acience but I think you are wasting your time. I agree with the person above. I also think you should reply to the people who have written to you because you just never know. You may as well get all you can get out of your money.
5:55 PM
Good for you for being honest with B.! It's hard to do but there's no sense in dragging it out if you know you're not interested. I definitely think you and Funny Guy should be friends if that's possible from his end. Even if you met in a purportedly romantic context, you can still pursue friendship.
I've often heard that online dating (and "regular" dating too) is a numbers game. As in, you just have to keep meeting people, and at some point, statistically, you will meet someone you click with.
I have found that you can't tell from a person's profile whether you will like them. You have to meet them in person.
Hang in there for another week!
8:54 AM
any chance you can change this blog name to "2 months of jdating" ?
maybe you didnt click yet with people on jdate -- but you clicked with a bunch of people through your blog! so you DID get your money's worth in a strange round-about sort of way.
--Emma--
2:59 PM
Post a Comment
<< Home